Why should I live on your couch for a month?

Lotsa reasons, and it doesn't have to be a couch. I could be coaxed into a guestroom, if you really forced me two.
The first reason is that I am a real hoot to have around. Imagine this conversation with your loved ones....

"Who's that bulky fellow who seems to be living on your couch there? "
"Oh, some dude living a bastard hybrid of a wetdream out."
"Is that safe?"
"I've never slept sounder in my life, he's like a big mean dog that walks himself and cooks a delightful breakfast once or twice a week to boot."
"Can he make tofu taste good?"
"He sure can, and all those little things I wanted to do around the house are finally getting done."
"That paintjob is far above drunken brother quality, it's actually semi-professional."
"He was going to start a painting company for awhile, but decided to pursue his dream of non-home ownership instead, before he got to old to be any fun to be around"

The second reason is that my time is precious and seems wasted in the warehouse. You need shit done around your home, vacation property or office. I can help. That's why they call me helpful Harry. Just lets keep it around four hours a day so I can stay fresh. You can tell your people you are hiring a temp to keep down costs and that they have nothing to worry about and go ahead and try to treat me like shit and see what happens to you. I could probably make your biggest problem employees quit within a few months a friendly bantering and amateur psychoanalysis of their weaknessess.